Happy New Year

Gooey-eyed Muslim aeroplane terrorists, corrupt money men, rotten spouses and bad jokes aside, have a happy new year!

A Fool And His Money # 1

It's time for this blog to start a new series, so this time, it's: A Fool & His Money, from the old saying, "A fool and his money are soon parted."

Our first fool, as reported by The Daily Mail is 72 year old, ex-pilot, Patsy Brogan, whose bride to be is Polish migrant worker, Daria Weiske (you must see the pictures!).

Says Patsy:

"We're hopelessly in love."

and I can certainly see why. Patsy must seem like a god to her and not er...a patsy.

John Lennon Parody: Genius Is Pain!

As readers of this blog may be aware, I'm fascinated by the late John Lennon and couldn't help but chuckle when I discovered this little beauty from 1972, a send-up of Lennon's

I've-just-left-The-Beatles-and-I'm-really-angry

1970 interview in Rolling Stone, later released as the book, Lennon Remembers.

The video is a well-meaning, garish attempt to illustrate the original audio track, which had been collated (these are almost all Lennon's words) by National Lampoon's Tony Hendra* - later known as Spinal Tap's manager, Ian Faith. Hendra's vocals, especially on the fade-out are hilariously close to Mother, the opening track on Lennon's Plastic Ono Band album.

This track was released as Magical Misery Tour, simply because of the punning Beatle tag but really, Genius Is Pain is more appropriate, I should know!

John Lennon Parody: Genius Is Pain!

* Hendra is now notorious because his daughter has written a book claiming that he sexually abused her, How To Cook Your Daughter.

Don't Attempt A Heist If You're Hungry

I love stories about stupid criminals! My guess is either that they parallel our stupid Overlords in some weird, inverse proportional, cosmic way or just that they're so dumb, it's hilarious.

Anyway, The Sun reports that an as-yet-un-named robber was attempting an armed robbery of a fast-food joint until he came over all peckish.

N.B. "nicked" is English slang for "arrested by the police.".

Heart-felt Covers: podline666 - Summer Breeze

I don't know whether you remember the summer of 1972 - a great year for pop music - and one of the radio hits that made great aural fodder was Seal & Crofts' Summer Breeze.

It wasn't a song that I'd ever buy - it wasn't really my cup of tea and certainly didn't help me define my teenage world - but even then, I knew it was something special.

Time has been kind to the song and it's now a well-deserved radio standard. So, given that you'll all know the original, I'm posting this enthusiastic cover by podline666 because I love some of the comments that he's received - they really make Summer Breeze come back to life for me.

N.B.: It looks like podline666 has CROFT-ILY added some harmony vocals, too.

podline666: Summer Breeze

"This great track actually should have been a summer song in 1972. Despite reports from a few radio stations that it had hit potential during June and July, it didn't catch on until late September of that year when Bill Gavin finally reported it as 'sleeper of the week'.  As someone to whom the industry listened closely, the song was thus launched to the masses and became a Top 10 hit later in autumn.

Thanks for bringing us these memories through your superb performances, Larry!"

youtuber dllewiszz

"Nicely done! Yeah, this for sure brings back memories of those hot summer days before A/C [air conditioning]- BBQs in the yard around the pool."

youtuber rabmmt

"We didn't have A/C when I was a kid and I remember listening to this song with crickets and katydids singing along in the background while praying for a breeze to relieve the oppressive heat.

This song takes me back to:

• screen doors and windows left open all night
• sleeping on the living room floor on a pallet in front of the box fan &
• fish fries in the back yard between the peach trees

Good times."

youtuber dollybigmamma

"This [does] make me feel fine!!

I'd be so pleased to fix you a drink and listen to the rest of your summer repertoire on the deck!

You brought back a lot of great memories with your song choice. This was one of my first 45's that I played on my very own record player. I was so pleased to see that under the Christmas tree! In return, I treated the family to many sessions of playing the same few songs over and over.

Now that I think about it, I'm sure my parents lived to regret that purchase."

youtuber bridgemix63

Oursourced Santa

N.B.: Here in Australia, it's already Christmas Day!

Well, that's the modern world. I busted Santa this year and found that Santa had outsourced some of his work.

Was I shocked, or what?

Still, in 2009, rest assured, Santa didn't just come once.

Oursourced Santa

Merry Christmas to all and best wishes for 2010.

First Gay Chinese Night Club Opened

Hoo-bloody-ray! The Sydney Morning Herald reports that the first official, government-backed Chinese Gay bar has opened!

Apparently, "the venue aims to provide a place where homosexuals can meet in a relaxed atmosphere and get information about HIV/AIDS prevention."

Kinda takes the fun out of being a gay bar, don't you think?

Hmm, I wonder if "education" will soon turn to "beducation"?

Ah well, it takes all kinds but nothing can defend this Euro-poof disco trash by Tomboy. It's appalling!

Tomboy: It's OK To Be Gay

N.B.: "The official China Daily newspaper said in 2005 that the number of homosexuals in China came to around 30 million, although it conceded few were willing to acknowledge their sexuality."

Have Yourself A Very Gay Christmas

'Tis the season to be jolly blah-blah blah-blah blah blah-blah blah blah.

And we all know what happens at this time of year. Yes, neo-nazi skinheads like me go out poofter-bashing, fairy-flogging and pillow-biter-punching!

Sneer all you like at me but I've got God and Jesus on my side. Mind you, things could be worse for those evil little faggots:

1. England's The Guardian reported that lesbians are being gang-raped and/or stabbed in South Africa to help them see the error of their ways &
2. CNN reports that in Uganda, a law is being considered that would put gays and lesbians in prison - and have you put to death if you had AIDS etc. - Nice!
   

Seig Heil and a merry christmas to all.

Heart-felt Covers: Heart - Tell It Like It Is

As someone who had only known oif the American band Heart for their phenomenal Led-Zep-meets-pop Seventies hit, Barracuda, I was unaware of the band's progress over the years.

In the 80s they became a big-hair band making boring corporate pop - increasingly hindered by singer Ann Wilson's ballooning weight.

In the fat noughties, Ann Wilson has become something of a poster-girl for the tubbies and is still rockin' with Barracuda!


However, despite moving towards bland music in the 80s, they still scored well by picking up Aaron Neville's obscure r'n'b hit, Tell It Like It Is, turning the limp-wristed original into an altogether more muscular beast.

Most of all, the song was nailed by Ann Wilson's d-d-d-d-dynamic lead vocals, splendidly acted out in the music video. Yes, the big hair is an embarrassment but Tell It Like It Is is a cover version that anyone should be proud of.

For any modern poppet trying to make it as a sex queen in music videos, just forget it - Ann Wilson is the real deal - that's how it's done, with her whole body expressing the music.

Nice!

Heart: Tell It Like It Is

Highlights:

1.31 singer Ann Wilson's rockin' leg
1.43 Ann Wilson's shoulders echoing the drum frill
1.52 Ann Wilson's dramatic hand placed upon her sister, guitarist Nancy's shoulder
2.30 the guitarist's tacky prom guitar solo with non-syncopated, occasional handclaps by the party-goers

The Beatles: Have You Heard The Word - Fake track

I've listened to the late Maurice (Bee Gee) Gibb's wonderful Have You Heard The Word a few times this week - never having come across it before. It has to be the best Beatles / Lennon 1969 piss-take that I've ever heard - utterly convincing! No wonder it was turning up on Beatle bootlegs for ages.

The Beatles: Have You Heard The Word - Fake track

For the full story, including the dirt on even Yoko Ono being fooled, go to Fake Beatles.